The Strength We Need.
The Lord is a refuge for the oppressed, a stronghold in times of trouble. Those who know your name will trust in you, for you, Lord, have never forsaken those who seek you.
Psalm 9:9-10
In his classic A Tale of Two Cities, Charles Dickens said it best, “it was the best of times it was the worst of times.” How many times can we see this in our world today? I see it in my circle almost daily. Social media has undoubtedly perpetuated this as we scroll through the stories of friends and family and view up-to-date happenings of all the good and sometimes devastating circumstances.
The past few weeks have painted this scenario in my life in a way that I had hoped would never come. I hesitated in sharing this part of my journey, for I do not want to be interpreted as living as a victim of my circumstances. But I want to encourage you that God is there to be our refuge, our freedom, our strength, and hope in our pain. Is it an easy process? No. But it is my hope we find the courage to press through our challenges and lean into the God who makes a way.
I have written in several contexts about the journey God has led me on with my son and Autism. The road has had high highs and low lows. I have found treasure in some of the daily accomplishments of life as they were markers of growth and potential for my boy. I have faced the brutality of humankind when others have felt the need to mock, stare, and ridicule because of their insecurity and being uneasy with differences. For you parents out there, I do not know how you respond when your child is bearing the brunt of evil, but for me, I turned into the most vicious of creatures, ready to devour anyone who comes close to harming my child. I have had to learn to pause and let my emotions pass before I respond. I am a work in process.
It seems God is transforming me in different areas of my life, like seasons. We all face the coming and going of seasons. My family has managed to get past many dark and cold places and stumbled into new beginnings with the hope of opportunities. In the past few years, we have pushed through the unknown, celebrated the unexpected, and pivoted when needed. But a new season has arrived, and that is the season of graduation.
For those who have paid the price, put in the time, and persevered through this unexpected pandemic, this month is a time of accomplishment and celebration. For my family, it is a reminder of our broken dreams. You see, the classmates that God gave my son as beautiful gifts many years ago are walking across stages this month, graduating from college and stepping into independent lives (well, at least trying).
From the couch the other day, my son asked, “Mom, you graduated in the fall, right? So I can graduate this fall too? My friends are all graduating. I saw their pictures. I can graduate this fall, right?” My heart dropped. My son is slowly but surely making his way through community college but is nowhere near close to graduating. Nor do I have complete confidence he ever will.
Do you ever have those moments when Biblical truths come pouring into your mind, but they almost seem contradictory? “I can do all things” or “Nothing is impossible with God.” (This is where an exegesis class is very beneficial to fight the war between the emotions and the mind). Those were the words I wanted to speak to my son but did not out of fear that they would not come true. I lacked faith.
We all have emotional ups and downs. Just last night, I was meeting with friends, and we all had our struggles to share. It was important to point out the even though those pains came from different circumstances, they all resulted in the same emotional torment. How are we to process these piercing stabs and stay standing strong?
In all of our lives, God knows what is coming. He knows the dreams we have. He knows which ones will come into fruition and which ones will shatter in an instant. He knows. He cares. We are given a choice to how we react or respond to these circumstances. He promises to be our refuge, our strength. He promises to make a way when we cannot see one. He is our very present help in times of trouble.
The question is, are we willing to place the concerns, struggles, pains, and heartbreak into his hands and TRUST HIM? Are we willing to relinquish the control and be still and know? I do not know about you, but for me, trust is a process. God continues to peel away the layers of my insecurities and fears that keep me from fully trusting in Him, especially in the circumstances I do not understand.
We are so fortunate to serve a compassionate and gracious God. He knows every thought we have and yet, responds to each one with love. God’s grace is sufficient. It may not feel it sometimes, but those are the times we need to look at His word. We need to remind ourselves of what we KNOW to be true, not what we feel.
For me, I hold onto Isaiah 41, where He tells us to FEAR NOT! He is with me. He will strengthen me. He will help me. He will uphold me. He is the LORD, MY GOD. He will hold my right hand. He is the ONE who helps me.
When those stabs to the heart or punches to the gut come, we do not face those alone. We may not understand the why, but we have the how; The Lord is a refuge for the oppressed, a stronghold in times of trouble. We just need to seek Him, TRUST in Him and watch Him make a way!!